Loving the Unlovable


There are  people who know exactly how to push your buttons. They make your life harder. Selfish, rude, proud, inconsiderate. We all met or had encounter these kind of undesirable traits. We can forgive them, how they wronged us, the pain may not be there anymore, but the scar is still there as a reminder.

The hurtful words spoken from people who you had helped, and gave your trust. As if they have forgotten how you helped them when they needed you.

They make you feel uncomfortable, they do not respect your boundaries, they create confusion. as if they don’t want you to see you happy. They would watch your every move criticize and would await your fall.

And if there is a time that they return the favor, there would be strings attached, and you will be reminded of the debt that you owe them.

When dealing with difficult individuals, I learned:

Be kind to others always. Be kind to yourself

Be gracious to others, give yourself grace too

Be mindful of  other people’s boundaries as well as respect yours

Do not give your opinion when unsolicited.

Do not offer help when not needed. If they need help, they will say so. You can say no and offer solutions or compromise.

Expect nothing in return.

Treat others like they want to be treated.

Sometimes people don’t want nonsense, sometimes they will tolerate nonsense.


Self affirmations when I doubt myself:

How can I love others if I don’t love myself?

I am worthy of love, even if I don’t get it from others.

When I am vulnerable, I am reminded that I am not alone.

When I am  depressed , I am reminded that happiness is temporary and so is loneliness.

When I am tired of everything, I know where to find rest.

When adversity comes, I am reminded that God will never forsake me.

When everything is going wrong, I am reminded I can rely on God

When everything is going right, the more I needed God.

When I am kind to myself, I become a better person, and when I feel that way, I treat

people better no matter how unlovable they may seem to be.


  • Anonymous

    Naku tich, i used to have a co worker that was so nega. He actually advised to his students na do not be nice to patients! Exact words. Can you believe that.
    His goal was to be firm with rehab especially woth early mobility but it was coming accross as rude and non-emphatic. When you confront him about it, ge gyerahin ka nya. His point was: the hospital is not a hotel where you relax. My point is, these people are sick.
    I hope he can read your blog para naman magkaroon sya ng konting empathy or sympathy

  • RDS

    I hope he’s not as condescending as he sounded to be. Maybe he just want to set boundaries so the hospital staff won’t get too attached to their patients? Whatever the reason maybe, we should treat our patients the right way- with utmost respect, kindness and humility. Our profession is also our calling & we are accountable for all our actions & the seeds we sow. I believe that empathy can be learned thru personal experience. It let us understand how others feel and how to react accordingly. Thanks for commenting and sharing your insightful thoughts tich! Sending positive thoughts and prayers to all!

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