the excruciating talks

As an introvert, I like listening more that talking. I rather not engage in  meaningless conversations . Small talks are uneasy for me. Not everyone can understand what you really mean. Sometimes, I get caught off guard that even after a heated argument, the conversation still plays on my head, thinking if I had said the right things, or if I had defended my point well without compromising my values. We can control the words that come out of our mouths and choose the words that shouldn’t be said. On the other hand, the hurtful words do come out from the mouth of the people you love,

Talks that I rather not hear:

unsolicited opinions: this can range from: your child’s behavior, how to raise your child, that translates to how horrible you are in parenting.

insensitive remarks/ stating the obvious: instead of a casual greeting, making a remark about a person’s weight gain or loss is uncalled for. There are a lot of factors why a person is heavy and assuming that they just a lazy couch potato is very insensitive. Being tactless in situations that doesn’t warrant your expertise can hurtfully destroy ones’ confidence.

He/she will tell you how not to spend your money.  Not to splurge on anything nice for yourself. Not to spend money on unnecessary things or anything uneconomical and wasteful. They will judge the price tag on any small and big purchases that you carefully thought of buying. Not to spend money on dining out unless there is an occasion.

Instead of being happy for other people success in the wealth or looks department, he/she say that they are only showing off , acquire their riches illegally or has had a procedure done.

If you are still unmarried, single, divorce, he/she tells you that all your relationships are doomed from the start.

Telling you not to go to the church saying that they are just after your money. The only religion that is right is the one that his/her forefathers had.

The only opinion that is right is his/hers only. He/she is a master manipulator. Don’t let his/her charms deceive you:

Treating people nicely because they are well off and mocking those with poor stature

Looking down on people who’s not fortunate to have a good career or education.

Doing good for someone you know can repay you. Giving favors to those who are well-off because he/she expecting to be repaid

He/she likes to compare you to your peers, your siblings or your schoolmates. How well they are doing is in comparison. Why aren’t you more like them?

His/her favorite sport is meddling in your life. They have the front seat as to being a spectator to the day that you will finally crack up.

He/she enjoys belittling you when you make poor choices.

He/she criticizes all that you eat and saying that its unhealthy.,

He/she will tell you that your lazy when you take a day off from work

He/she uses you when it’s convenient. When he.she gets what he/she wants, you become their doormat.

He/she likes to criticize your cooking, your driving and how you manage your household.

He/she wants you to fail only so he/she can tell you I told you so

He/she want you to experience the suffering he/she had while growing up in harsh times.

When your doing well, he/she still tells you that you still don’t deserve nice things.

He/she enjoys seeing you miserable when something unfortunate happens, he/she blames your carelessness.

He/she are happy with the idea that you will drown in debt because of buying things that you want.

He/she will tell you that your life choices are wrong. Your marriage is a failure. That it is all your fault

He/she wants to destroy your relationship and wants you to have an eternal debt to him/her the time when they do you a favor. Putting you on a endless guilt trip.

Without offering any solution, he/she knows you have a problem, and he/she is making it appear to be worse than it already has.

You share, you give him/her your time at your wits end, it is not enough

These people that make your life a little less joyful do exist. They take you in the mire with them, making it unbearable just thinking of it. They treat you like you have no worth with their endless judgement. It is better to distance yourself and ignore the negativities than to wallow in grief.

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